target - there's one in everytown

this will be quick since my alarm is currently set for 4:30 am.  i arrived in st george around 4 this afternoon and the drive could only be described as majestic.  i know. not the most attractive of adjectives but the only one i could think of as i drove through the walls of rocks whose beauty could only be felt by ones presence.  it was a drive much like i hope my remaining journey will be.

after i found the hotel and managed to get all my stuff up the stairs.  first lesson when tri traveling, request a bottom floor.  i then ventured out to find a target.  i forgot advil and even i know that this weekend was not going to be possible without a little help from my friend.  and there it was never to let me down.  then it was off to dinner to meet "the others".

i've been training solo, being the turtle with his or hers (respectively) head in my shell.  i've been stuck there and is always been easier to just do it myself then to reach out to others.  so although the "training camp" hasn't technically started yet.  i made my way across the street to meet 10 other triathletes for dinner.  i went for two reasons.  1. to see what i was up against and 2. to determine if i'd show up tomorrow.

i decided on number two.  so my alarm is set and hopefully i'll decide to hit the pool at 6 with a my new found tri group.

PK and a few thoughts pre camp

meeting PK was like seeing the bright light to the gates of heaven.  he is hands down the best spin instructor out there and has managed to work my butt to a much smaller size then it was pre pk.  the rest of me well, i still love my vino and cookies so i'm working on it.   i leave for training camp the day after tomorrow and i'm having that "in over my head feeling".  the fact that my favorite tri store got hit by the recession and had to close didn't come as a good sign either.

55 minutes with PK and i was feeling back to normal.  i hit the treadmill for a 20 minute quick run and then headed off to class.  lately, i've been having a mix of emotions when it comes to this training camp.  it doesn't help that 22 of the 23 people attending profiles pictures on facebook include them at a finish line and the one that isn't is sitting in an ice bath.  good thing i took the one down of me at ally's fire pit sipping vino and eating marshmallows!

its mind over matter for me at this point,.  i'm counting on my mental strength to get me through this weekend.  four days of non stop training.  to date my biggest nightmare was when Mr. T used to make us run until he said stop with our lacrosse sticks in the air, that was almost 20 years ago. i'm pretty sure i'll have a new "nightmare" by the time the weekend is through.

less than 100 days to go until the actual ironman and i found a mantra, its a personal one so i won't share but it will get me through the steepest of hills, i'm sure of it.

 i'll be making updates, if i'm still alive, from st. george this weekend so wish me luck.  i'll need it!

Meeting MACCA

Today I was down at the San Diego Convention Center justifying more of my "i need this for my bike, i need these for my swim purchases." I almost came home with a new Garmin but I decided on just a new TYR jacket for early morning rides and runs. Training camp is in less than a month and I'm really excited at the thought of being able to get a preview of the course as i'm sure it will determine my mental state for the next several months.  the training in the pool is going so much better than it was last time i updated the blog and i'm focusing on my form and breathing more now than i did when i swam on a swim team.  i'm sure my old coaches are glad to hear i was so dedicated back in the day!  either way the little giant got a full fitting last week and i'm feeling more comfortable and confident both up AND down the hills.  i was lucky to get an excel spreadsheet from a fellow IMSGer which mirrors the incline and mileage for the run portion of the course so any treadmill workouts are now following the IRONFIT intermediate plan and adding in Bil's excel course mock up.

Oh yea and while in San Diego i met MACCA. wicked friendly, way approachable, and well not to hard on the eyes either.  

a day in the life of my training

spin class. its a needed break from the trainer or an outside ride (although with all the rain i've been logging more miles on the bike at the gym then on my giant)  the trainer, to be honest i've only been on once at the new place.  lance and i need to reconnect with his time trial video sooner rather than later.

i'm no longer skipping swims.  (this is my blog and if i start telling little white lies its only because i wanted to sound like there are no holes in my training).  but this is reality and this is me.  so i have NOT, finished a complete training day yet with my swim.  i can't seem to get over 45 minutes in the pool, partially because there is really good eye candy on those pool decks and partially because i have ADD and i'd rather be running.  either way i'm slowly and surely making my way through the 3000 m every other day.

tonight.  i finished spin class, crappy music but great instructor.  and then i ran.  and then i came home to an amazing dinner (thank goodness my boyfriend can cook otherwise it might be cereal every night).

tomorrow the bike is going to get fitted for next months training camp.  i haven't been to a training camp since i was a little kid and i'm excited, nervous, and ready to go tackle the next mission that is.... my journey to IMSG.

stay tuned.

and then it was 2011

so as it turns out time does not stop. i more than anyone have realized that this year,  2010, did not stop.  not for me.  not for anyone.   i was reminded how lucky i am and was also reminded what i'm capable of.  i became someone i wasn't sure i could be and i started kicking major ass at the gym.  i conquered the fear of swimming in the Potomac river, i witnessed a death and i witnessed a life.  on christmas i became more concerned with the content of santa's letter and leaving carrots for the reindeer with my niece then i did about logging miles for the day.  yes, training is important.  its essential.  but remembering why you are doing it in the first place trumps all the training in the world.  

2010 was a year of battles, a year of bliss, a year of pure "i'd just like to damn well forget".  but without 2010 there would be no 2011.  and without 2011 there would be no IMSG.  so here's to missing a swim so i could listen to my father read the night before christmas to his new grand kids, here's to taking a walk instead of a run to catch up with an old friend,  heres to riding wooden airplanes with my newest nephew instead of riding bikes.  heres' to 2011! 

and then there was turkey

Thanksgiving came and went and with it any type of structured training plan. Its in typical style that I would sign up for one of the most difficult ironmans in the circuit as my first, move into a new house, career search, serve as a bridesmaid to my big sister, and become an aunt to 4 new nieces and nephews all at the same time.

People may say a lot about me, but they will never say I’m boring.


God works in mysterious ways, I don’t think I’ve ever in my life had more going on than I do at this very moment. Some good, some bad but all with a positive attitude.  It sometimes seems like a world wind of information that I have to keep processing over and over again.  swim, run, bike, lift, repeat.  as i was finishing up my swim yesterday i thought to myself its now or never. i played songs in my head, thought about last Christmas, thought about last year, thought about this year, thought about where i've been, thought about where i am, and then thought about where i was going....... straight to st. george. 

and so as Christmas approaches this year I’ve seemingly gotten myself back on track (somewhat).  My letter to Santa might start something like....

Dear Mr. Claus, this year I want myself back, the same one that finished the Broad Street Run, the same one that crossed the finish line in not one, but two marathons.  and the one that well: survived this year. 

ponytail eligible

i haven't had an event on the calendar since the super sprint HB.  last week i got re introduced to two things, candy corn and the weight room.  one clearly a result of the other.  i'm alternating between gyms i like the pool at one and the equipment at the other.  kind of like when i was little and my mom bought her produce at one food store and everything else at another. whatever gets you there, right? 
i've been an absent member of spin class but only because i found the spinners at the new gym which allows me to kick my own butt on a regular basis. its almost the six month mark until IMSG and the nerves are setting in, but then i look back at my journey and it makes it all worth while.

still no alcohol and the added bonus to pool workouts i've discovered is the chlorine is assisting in my ever growing attempt to grow my hair long again.

 its officially past my shoulders and that is all the incentive i need!

Life's Ambition - Hermosa Beach Race Report

"you may feel a competitive streak today as you strive to be the best in every situation" 

this is how my dailyom horoscope began today. 

the alarm went off at 4:15 am and it was pitch black outside.  welcome to tri world.   mike and i arrived early, set up our areas, and were ready to go.  he was in the first wave so i was able to see him out of the water while i'll waited anxiously for my start.  it was refreshing not to be a "newbie" anymore.  i've got this swim i thought, until i hit the water.  it was choppy than last year but manageable,  i think i only got kicked once which was a definite bonus!  i finished a minute and change later than last year and ran up the transition to my bike knowing i'd have to make it up now or never.  the course is flat and three loops around, the bike felt great.  i kept checking to see who was around me for two reasons,  one.  i wanted to make sure i was passing anyone with the numbers 30-34 on their left calf and two. to make sure no one could hear me talking out loud to myself  "its not an option to slow down"  "st george will NOT be this nice" "you WILL do this".  and i did.  off the bike, a quick chat with mike and off to my run feeling strong.   i found her within the first 2 minutes, a 24 year old who passed me.  she was my incentive.  you must beat her to the finish, i don't care how you do it, just do it.  visions of the ironman from yesterday filled my head as MACCA overcame to take the win.  (i know a little different, but you get what i'm saying)  i caught her with a 1/4 mile left and flew by her to the finish. 

another one bites the dust. 

1:09:36. there's no way i made the top 10 in my AG this year. however,  the best part about thinking you did a lot worse is realizing you  actually did much better.  number 6.  maybe next year i'll reach that podium!

cloudy with a chance of sun

the manhattan beach 10k was this past sunday. i finished and for the first time i actually paid attention to my pr and went out trying to beat it. 50:35 was the final time and although i didn't beat it, i had a great race none the less. 

in previous races i've always gone out taking in the course alone. but i was reminded this past week its nice to have someone there beside you to push you just a little harder, to remind you that you can finish it, and to have someone who stays with you even if you don't stay with them.  over the past 8 months i've been told more times then i can count, "everything happens for a reason".   it of course never seems like it does until well, until it does.  i've still got a long way to go.  mentally and physically.  i've still got a lot of battles, hills, and long runs to conquer.  but now it seems a little easier with a new partner.  turns out we all have demons we want to fight.  and if we can find someone to fight them with it makes the battle that much easier. 

not just finishing anymore

i just finished my registration for hermosa beach's annual day at the beach sprint triathlon.  what a difference a year makes. 

last year i borrowed a tri suit, a wetsuit, a helmet, rode in on a hybird.  i'd never rode over 15 miles or swam more than 20 minutes in the ocean.  i rode with sneakers.  i had a cheering section that has since all moved away and my home is no longer in hermosa.

i crossed the finish line 10th in my AG. and i fell in love with tri's.

this year i own a wetsuit, so many tri suits challenge is deciding on the zoot or tyr, i have my new giant complete with speedplays.  i just finished a great ride on saturday with what just might be my new support system. i've done so many open water swims i lost count.  and i've got an ironman on my calendar. 

you've come a long way baby.

have a little faith in me

we get time everyday.  sometimes we even wish time away.  it seems there is a lot of hurry up and wait going on in life.  maybe one day we can all vow to hurry up and take it all in.

 i'm going to try.

this new thought process will mean embracing every long run, every ocean swim, every uphill pedal stroke.   it will mean holding onto every second, every minute, every hour. this year has been a year of lessons for me, a year of redefinition, a year of great joy and a year of great loss.  a good friend said to me once "want to make God laugh? tell him you future plans." 

i was brought up catholic. and from my first catholic school experience i'm pretty sure God knew i would be a challenge.  the nuns were sent from him i thought, to make my life that much more miserable.  there was sister helen ann who at 6 years old separated my best friend and i from the same kindergarten class because "christina roth and kathleen curry, are just causing to much trouble together"  then it was onto first grade when "mom sister julie just does not like me, no i was not talking in class she is just not nice, mom"  in second grade i didn't like the knee socks they made us wear so i would push them down to be ankle socks.  i told the nuns that it wasn't my fault the elastic was gone and they wouldn't stay up.  sister dennis fixed that with rubber bands.  i was a determined little 8 year old. 

along the way there have been several people who have restored my faith, there was the youth leader who even though he knew my friends and i joined the church to go on the ski  retreats and to meet the cute boys from upper merion, he had faith in us and steered me back in the right direction.  we all have our angels in life, whether we believe in God or not.  i had one recently, who i admired for being so open and honest with his faith.  ironically enough he got me started in this triathlon business.   he remains a silent angel for me and he taught me that if i have the faith (strength and love) i can accomplish anything.   anything. 

now when i run, swim, and bike i pray.  i pray for everyone who doesn't have enough time, i pray to thank God for giving me time.  let's just hope he gives me enough to finish before midnight on May 7 2011.

i'm excited about what lies ahead but also scared of what the rest of 2010 has in store.  because God knows, i never imagined this, i never thought i would be a triathlete.

nations tri - race report (rain and all)

i woke up at 3:30 am with a sore throat and rain pounding on the streets below.  i laid there until 5:00 wondering if i was going to be able to complete the swim portion.  i hate the swim, if we are being honest.  i know as a triathlete i'm supposed to enjoy all three events equally but i don't.  the swim makes me that much more thankful that its finally time for the bike and run.  i look forward to it.

we arrived at 6:30 am complete with a slight mishap with the shuttle, we had to get off and walk across the mall to the transition area due to some closed roads and an uninformed bus driver.  it wasn't seeming to start out so well.  we made it to transition and i was happy to just be there.  i tried to remember everything, shoes here, helmet on the bike, gu in the pocket, running shoes and another pair of dry socks.  did i remember it all?  body glide for my neck and wetsuit on. check. check. and check.  i grabbed janine and we were off. 

two hours later i was in the water wondering what the hell i was doing here, AGAIN.  the swim was hard.  i got kicked, punched, and pushed more than i would have liked.  i had my mantra in my head "everythings gonna be alright" and swam away.  the buoys seemed to be multiplying by the second.  out of the water and onto the bike.  i felt good, not awesome. i still had a way to go. 

i was excited to try out the new ride and finally be the one to yell "on your left' instead of getting yelled AT.   i prayed for no flats, since again, if we are being honest i haven't a clue on how to work C02 or change a flat.  i'll learn soon, promise. that or God's going to make the next race quite a "learning experience"  for me.  the ride was rainy, beautiful, and flat.

I got off the bike, loved every second.  and then it was onto the run.  my favorite part.  a beautiful course (even in the pouring rain)  FYI announcer guy the rain actually did not stop after 7 am.   The run is my strength don't know how it was or how it became my strength but it is and i embrace every moment of it.  i think it because i like cheering others on and having others cheer me on as we run by.  we are all in this together.  big, small, white, black, poor, rich.  we all trained (some more than others) we all want to make it to the finish (some faster than others) and we all get to feel like rockstars at the finish line because at the end we are all "triathletes".  janine and i slapped high fives at the halfway point and it kept me going for the final run.  hot showers and good food was awaiting us at the finish.

2:51 and i was done. 

i couldn't end this race report without thanking some who although they think they don't matter much they make all the difference.  they stand in the rain with us, they keep us going when we want to quit, they support us through early morning wake ups, training runs, rides, and swims,  they understand (or say they do) when we get pissy after a bad run, ride, or swim.  and they still come out.  and they still love us. 

thank you spectators, thank you for helping us to continue to reach our dreams.

sometimes it just all comes together

originally this blog was going to be a testament of my training to complete an ironman competition. however, it has morphed into more than that.  more than a daily log of training runs, distance swims and spin class reports.  it seems to have become my outlet. my "disappointment that was my opportunity in disguise"

i was blessed with the trait of spontaneity, otherwise known as speaking, doing and acting without a filter.  it comes into my head and then "bam" there it goes. only realizing later the consequences of my actions.  some may think this is a bad habit and would work to perfect the ability to hold off and think through a situation, a planner if you will.

if we are being honest, this "habit" has not always worked in my favor.  there have been many a times i've purchased things that might have been a bit to expensive, said things i wish i could take back, signed up for races that i wasn't sure i could finish.  but then again being spontaneous is what led me to discover, explore, and allow myself to try to meet all those expectations, that i set for myself along the way.

as for the training, i've been taking in the lonely runs along the lake. its God's country up here. i've kept them short all about 5 miles, the air is thick and the sun is hot, i hope dc treats me a little better. i'm trying not to be hard on myself (after all that's part of the reason i'm up here) and i'm riding casually, trying to force myself to get in the lake and swim. its the one event that i once thought would be my hardest just based on difficulty and lack of technique. as of late though, everything has been "just coming together" for me so oddly enough i'm not that worried about it. 


i'll close with this....as i was driving back from meeting some family members for dinner last night, its been 25 years since i'd seen them last.  upon discussing what a wonderful night it was and how happy i was to have reconnected with them my good friend (who accompanied me to dinner) turned to me and said "look at where you've been in the past month"  those words were that final rock i needed lifted from my shoulder.   because look at how far i have come!  now i'll let things fall into place whether i plan them or not.

opening my eyes and seeing luck

i walked instead last night and the mosquito's walked with me.  i'm still in my little abyss otherwise known as just outside of minneapolis, minnesota and yesterday i took the day off.  

living in california you tend to get a bit jaded.  i mean i suppose i knew that the unemployment rates were high and that i was blessed (to say the least) to be able to participate in races around the country while getting myself back together in one piece.   it was a bit ironic to me that i had a new sense of strength and commitment while i was "taking the night off".

so far while out here my training has consisted of running and biking by the lake while swimming in the calm waters of central minnesota.  but i wouldn't be truthful if i didn't say that last nights walk and today's stroll around the state fair didn't hit a new chord for me.  that life isn't always so nice for everyone.  that i'm lucky to be alive, happy, and healthy.  i'm lucky that i don't have to wake up everyday wondering if the orange eviction sticker is going to be placed on my front door or if my job as a sheet rock layer is going to disappear because there's no new construction.  i'm lucky to know that although i've had my heart broken its never been because my husband of ten years left me with two kids, a house payment, a truck payment and an unwanted new start.  i'm lucky that the weather isn't going to predict if i can put food on the table for my family or that i have to tell my kids no because "i just can't afford it"

there are many reasons why i decided to do this years IMSG but my retreat to middle america has allowed me to add one more. 


because i'm lucky enough. 

change of scenery

i'm on my own personal retreat for a while.  i came up to one of my favorite places to reflect, relax, and do a little head clearing. 

before i left i sent my bike on her very first tri trip to washington dc.  i'll be part taking in the nations tri on september 12th.  its going to be my first olympic distance and i'm feeling  a little under prepared, although i think i say that every single race.  its like my own little handicap in case i bomb the thing. 

before i boxed her up and shipped her off i took her out on the first pv hill ride and can't believe it took me that long to get up there.  the natural high of cruising down those hills is better than any of my best vodka tonic nights, without the hangover!  i can't wait to get back and do it all again.  until then i'm relishing in my the beauty of big lake, minnesota.  

this morning i ran with the ducks, took in the wildflowers, waved to people as i passed by, and remembered why i came up here in the first place.

a new ride

SHE'S HERE!  i drove her home with the windows down, singing  along to "hey soul sister" the whole ride home along the coast.  i was happy.  after months of searching and weeks of waiting, my bike was finally here.

 and for the first time in a very long time i had a reason to feel excited about something.

like a little kid at christmas i couldn't wait to get my new "toy" home and out on the bike path.  i'm not well versed in the clipless pedals just yet and like a lot of things these days i'm teaching myself.  with learning sometimes we fall, sometimes pretty hard, and sometimes in front of an audience.  so yes, without even pedaling a step, i toppled over while still parked in the garage.  timed just perfectly as the neighbors were pulling out of their drive.

i laughed it off and rode away, elbow throbbing and a newly bruised knee, headed straight for the light at the end of my tunnel.

learning lessons

i swam in the ocean today.  1 mile.  i avoided shark week in anticipation. i have a long way to go, a long way.  but i finished. maybe next week i'll get around the pier and lose my fear of getting hooked with a fishing line.(seriously)  i learned a few things while spending quality time with the fish this morning that i thought i'd share just in case you ever find yourself wanting to jump in the freezing cold ocean at 8 am on a sunday morning.

lesson 1 -  body glide.  my neck looks like someone took a red marker and drew a line across the back.  note to self when swimming in salt water with a wetsuit while turning your head repeatedly, apply body glide. 

lesson 2 - remember to stay calm when getting kicked in the face. or at the very least kick back.

lesson 3 - water will get in your wetsuit and st. george is going to be cold.  figure out a way to get over it.

lesson 4 - even though the pier looks close, it is not.  even though you think you can just ride in a wave to finish,  you can not.  and even though it may seem you are swimming in a straight line, chances are, you are not.

swim. check.  now onto the run. but not without a little added inspiration. its amazing how hindsight makes things so much clearer.

i kicked out seven miles faster than i ever have before and added in some hills just for fun, yes for fun. 

harder. better. faster.stronger.  (thank you kayne)

the devil lives on 19th street

the other night i couldn't sleep, this isn't new as of late, but it is the first time i was up the entire night.   so i spent the extra 8 hours reading race reports for IMSG.  after about the fifth one i realized i'm going to need to stop running flats, period.  no more casual runs along the strand or the treadmill incline remaining frozen at 0.00.  its now or never. 

first stop, spin class. coincidentally the only class offered that day was an advanced spin.  i hopped on the bike and prepared myself for a rough ride, one hour later i was feeling pretty confident, wasn't so bad after all.  the following night was a different story, what a difference an instructor makes.   that's the first time i've ever dropped the f bomb, smiling, while sprinting up an imaginary hill.

and today was hill day.  lucky (or unlucky) for me, 19th street defines it.  and that is where the devil lives. he sits right at the top of the hill and smiles down at me for each and every rep. 

got me wondering if  he'll be in st. george? 

just in case, i'll practice my laugh, since i'll be getting the last one.

the day the music died

dear nano-

i wasn't prepared.  i wasn't prepared for the unannounced departure.  i knew you were sick when i saw those lines across your face but i thought it was because i hadn't fed you in a while.  i downloaded a little neil diamond and  eminem's new album and waited for you to recover, you did not.

i am not ready for us to go our separate ways.  PV does not know a run without you, the treadmill will be unbearable.  perhaps this is your way of forcing me back into the running group i left so many months ago?  i told you i'm not ready for that again yet.  everytime i look at you, you just stare back with this white blank look on your face and beep. 

beep.

at this point in my life i don't think i can justify adopting another family member into the mix, i've already fostered so many, just to have them leave me like you.  each generation; the original mini, the 2nd and 3rd generation, and now you, the nano.

 i took today off to make the decision.  should you stay or should you go?

RIP little silver nano. 

two is better than one

seems like lately all i want to do is spend time at the gym. i'm not sure when exactly these "two a days" started, maybe it was the first time i went at 11 am on a weekday and the only people there were either retired, unemployed, or SBW's (South Bay Wives)  and so i returned later hoping to be more in my element. 

either way, it started.  my workouts have changed too, i even powered off my ipod at one point today and it wasn't because the battery died.  i've found myself tuning out of "sportscenter" and into the form, technique, and speed of the swimmers in the pool below.  i need to stop competing with people on the treadmills though, i was trying so hard to see what speed the guy to me was going yesterday that i almost fell clear off the damn thing.  go ahead, laugh.  to be honest i'm shocked it hasn't happened already. 

swimming during the day is a different too.  the pool is full of little old ladies complaining about the kids swim lessons that take up an entire lane all summer long and how the pool toys keep floating over into the lap lanes while they try to do their swim aerobics, yes, swim aerobics.  i often want to point out to them  that the vast majority of people at the pool wish to actually SWIM in the lanes and not do pool aerobics  and that a pot shouldn't call a kettle black and so on and so forth.  but i refrain.  i think they just like to complain.  can't much blame them, i've been there myself.

going to the gym is my outlet these days, its helping me mend some things that were broken.  i'm thinking if i keep up the two a days it will be fixed twice as fast. 

i'll end with a quote from good ol' MJ:

(some of you will appreciate more than others)

"Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it."

amen.